Don't Miss Out On Exciting News!

Subscribe to my newsletter and get a free copy of Andromeda's Tear!
* indicates required
/ ( mm / dd )

Sunday, March 15, 2020

The Beat Goes On

When last we left off, I posted something about how I was moving right along on Hunting Astrid and should finish it up relatively quickly unless a meteor struck. (Paraphrasing here.) Well, the meteor did, in fact, strike, and I'm not just referring to whatever plague-ridden dystopia we're living in right now.

Usually it's me with all the issues, but unfortunately, a few days after my last post, my mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. It pretty much came out of nowhere—one week she was fine, and the next, she really wasn't. Obviously, we're all devastated. I've been railing against the universe about how unfair this all is, and I'll spare you all my rantings, though rest assured, there have been many. While the head oncologist doesn't like putting specific time frames on these things, the prognosis isn't good. Or, as he put it, this doesn't get cured, this just gets treated.

But. While there were tons of tears, then came anger and determination. The aforementioned meeting with the head oncologist came about four days into her chemo and radiation, and what do you know, she started really responding to treatment the very next day. We've always said that sadness doesn't accomplish much, but anger gets shit done. She said she needs to have goals, including going on all our planned vacations, and I said even if she needs an aide to come along, let's fucking do it. It's probably going to be a terrible year, but we're going to try our hardest to make sure there are some good moments in there, too.

I forget exactly what we were talking about when I was visiting her last weekend (before her rehab facility went on lockdown due to Covid-19), but she did tell me that life has to go on. And she's right, it does. It's still a horrible situation all around and I can find nothing good to say about it, but we have to keep on going.

Not long after that, I finally reopened MS Word, after it had been sitting neglected for a couple weeks. It took some time, but I eventually built up some momentum again. I think I can probably get this book done by the end of the month and be happy with the results. If nothing else, I know my mom has always been tickled by the fact that I write trashy romance as a hobby (she's read a couple of my books, but I've held firm that WE WILL NOT BE DISCUSSING THEM, EVER, NO REALLY, THAT CONVERSATION IS NOT HAPPENING), so that should be another reason to keep forging ahead. I don't think lesbian sci-fi is quite her cup of tea, but in case it wasn't blatantly clear with my all caps, if she reads it anyway, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

So that's what's been going on here. I keep saying it's not the tip of the iceberg, it's more like the base of the iceberg, as it's the biggest, most inescapable problem, and there's been plenty more piling on top of it. Stress levels are high, the world is a shitshow, but life does go on. And this book will hopefully be finished soon, dammit. Because persistence and determination run in the family.


  1. I never know what to say when life is storming on people, but I hope you all make this the best possible year you can. And the next one after that. I've been thinking about the "Life goes on" thing a lot since a tornado ripped through part of TN and killed people and wrecked things, and then I went and voted the next day, and I wondered if I should, but life goes on, with or without us, and it's a reminder, that I really need right now, that we can't stay stuck, and we can't shut down, regardless of what's going on, because we're still here. We have to keep fighting. And I love that your mom has read some of your work. :)

    1. I keep telling friends and family who say they don't know what to say that it's okay, because I don't know what to say or do, either. Everything feels like a disaster right now, but that feeling won't last forever. And I do like all the stuff circulating right now about how hopefully, as we all sit in our houses, everyone will gain a newfound appreciating for creating and consuming art. (Not that I'll get any more time to create due to the preschoolers also stuck in the house, but I wish everyone else bouts of extra productivity!)